Magic, the Gathering!

A party is happening, my friends are all there!

So I left to play Magic, the Gathering!

17 super models approached me in nothing but their underwear…

“MOVE!” I need to play Magic, the Gathering!

I was super hungry, and needed to eat…

Forgot about food when I played Magic, the Gathering!

My apartment’s so cold, because I didn’t pay for the heat…

Spent all my money on Magic, the Gathering!

I might have zero life, it isn’t the end, I’ll reset the dice, and gladly begin:

Another game of Magic, the Gathering!

You might think that my existence is a total waste, which I’ll tap with a Mountain to give all my creatures haste!!

Winning at Magic the Gathering!